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Navigating School Struggles: Supporting Autistic Children with ADHD and Anxiety

I have two autistic children, one with ADHD and task avoidance, the other with anxiety and school refusal. IEP meetings are coming up — any tips to help support them better?

Practical Strategies for School and Home

  1. Collaborate with the IEP Team

    • Share recent doctor's notes and behavior observations to help the team understand your children's challenges.
    • Discuss specific, measurable goals for task engagement, anxiety reduction, and classroom participation.

  2. Implement Predictable Routines

    • Visual schedules can ease anxiety by providing clear expectations.
    • Request that teachers preview daily activities with your younger child to reduce the "what if" spirals.

  3. Support Attention and Task Avoidance

    • For your 5th grader, try task chunking: break assignments into smaller, more manageable parts.
    • Explore accommodations like frequent breaks, a quiet workspace, or fidget tools.

  4. Use Calming Techniques

    • Grounding exercises work well at home — ask the school team to use similar strategies.
    • Social stories can help both kids understand and prepare for transitions.

  5. Helpful Resource:

    • The Explosive Child by Ross W. Greene provides compassionate, practical techniques for understanding and addressing challenging behaviors.

  6. Long-Term Considerations

    • Discuss attendance support if anxiety leads to frequent absences.
    • Consider involving a school social worker or counselor to provide additional emotional support.

💡 Tip: Stay proactive during the IEP meetings by asking, "How can we make the classroom environment more accessible for my child?" Small changes often make a big difference.